Weekend:<\/strong> Friday 6pm-Monday 6am<\/p>\nThe Samaritans is also available pretty much 24hr and although I didn\u2019t call them, perhaps the information might help someone else. \u2013<\/p>\n
116 123 (UK)<\/p>\n
116 123 (ROI)<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
And I called the NHS Crisis Team in my area.<\/p>\n
I think pain was also a massive factor. I\u2019ve had a few good months this year and have struggled this week in particular. I suspect I\u2019m adapting to the new painkillers that were doing so well and it\u2019s hard losing the independence and hope that was building. I was genuinely thinking that if my pain was managed then I could start to build a life again.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
My biggest problem with the homelessness thing is the lack of power and support out there. Everyone; Homeless Team, Council, Politicians have used the words \u2018probably\u2019, \u2018maybe\u2019 and \u2018possibly\u2019. No one has actually offered wording or sentences that actually offer any tangible value. \u00a0And I know this is to cover people\u2019s backs. I understand that. But what type do we live in when the best we can give to a chronically ill person who is going to end up on the streets is a \u2018maybe\u2019.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It all feels down to luck and in case anybody hasn\u2019t noticed \u2013 I\u2019ve not had a glimmer of luck in three years. \u00a0\u00a0Everything I worked for, the degrees I put myself through, the decade I worked at the jobs I loved and the people I cared about were gone faster than you can say the word \u2018illness\u2019.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a very lonely life. I\u2019m useless at most social media things but Twitter allows for 140 character bursts which I why I like it. I probably don\u2019t have the energy beyond 140 characters.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a lovely community online. Yes, I\u2019ve had Trolls and yes there are always going to be people that enjoy the misery of others but mostly I\u2019ve had a good experience. I\u2019ve met people I wouldn\u2019t have met any other way and done things that I could only ever dream about \u2013 paintings, doing cute drawings and creating unicorns (the latter is a surprisingly divisive thing).<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t get me wrong \u2013 I\u2019ll never understand people who come onto my account just to criticise the cheerfulness or a rainbow. I\u2019ve never sought out someone just to let them know how shit they are.\u00a0 I think they must be even more miserable than me to do so.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
But most of all I really want folk to know that it\u2019s ok to need help. I tend to ask when it\u2019s far too late or not at all. This is the first time in my history that I\u2019ve asked for help before the ship sailed. \u00a0And it was ok. Nothing has actually tangibly changed in my circumstances\u2013 except that people know I need help and it\u2019s out there.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t get me wrong \u2013 we could have all done without a Twitter-meltdown. But people were kind and wanted to help and wanted to speak because, and I say this despite still feeling darker, people are mostly good.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
You are not alone. Even when it feels that way.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
http:\/\/breathingspace.scot\/<\/a>\u00a0 – 0800 83 85 87<\/p>\nWeekdays:<\/strong> Monday-Thursday 6pm to 2am
\nWeekend:<\/strong> Friday 6pm-Monday 6am<\/p>\n <\/p>\n
Samaritans (24 hour)<\/p>\n
116 123 (UK)<\/p>\n
116 123 (ROI)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I had been crying for two\/three days. With thoughts wildly varying from taking over the world to curling up into a ball and dying. Sometimes I was ok. And then suddenly I wasn\u2019t. In-between the crying I was getting those headaches you get and then once I was feeling better it would start all over […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[108,110,106,105,53,61,104,109,107],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/217"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=217"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/217\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":218,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/217\/revisions\/218"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/defiaye.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}